Tag Archives: dreams

Cheesy dreams

31 Jan

Man alive. I love cheese. For the past week, I’ve been having cheese before bed. I’ve been doing the unthinkable- MIXING my cheeses together. Bit of brie on this, some boursain on that, slap on some emmental on here. All mixed up and in my belly. Yum-a-rama.

But what’s not yum-a-rama- cheesy dreams!! Fucking hell, they are the worst!! My cheese related dreams seem to revolve around two things- death and poo. I keep dreaming that important people in my life keep dying. And I keep pooing! What the actual fuck mate!!

So far, my parents, Slappy and my nephew have died on me. Whenever I wake up, I’m in an absolute traumatic state. I’m not sure if it’s real or not. When Slappy died on me, I woke up in an absolute panic. I couldn’t see him lying next to me and I was like AAAAH!! HE’S DEAD!! Turns out he was just hiding under the covers, the wee scamp. But yeah, cheesy dreams are traumatic.

I’m gonna have to lay off the cheese, as much as I love it. Dreaming about death and poo is never pleasant. Never.


Britain’s Next Top Model??

26 Nov

Today, myself and Suspenders are auditioning for the next series of Britain’s Next Top Model. I am excited/petrified.

For the past 3 years I have been modelling on and off, mainly to help out my pal Squeezy, who is an excellent make-up artist, or a few of my pals who are photographers and need to build up their portfolio. I’ve had a bit of tempermental relationship with modelling, sometimes I pure love it, sometimes I can’t be fucked with it in the slightest. I’ve always dreamed of being a supermodel though, so I guess BNTM is the place to give it a bash! I’ve got nothing to lose, and I’m used to being rejected ALL THE FUCKING TIME, so even if they say no I wont be too heart broken.

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